Saturday, February 27, 2016

Saturday Short Story: Anything But A Wake



When someone dies, everyone who knew them stinks of death.
Being the only kid at a wake is like being the only living person in a morgue: slightly creepy and very uncomfortable. But that’s what happens when your dad dies. At least, it’s what happened after my dad died.
 First, the drawn-out stay in the garbage-green hospital “suite”. Gotta love the insurance company’s generosity. The one rickety chair had been shoved into the only space not occupied by beeping machines. Not that dad noticed. His heart attack left him comatose until the end. But I definitely noticed.
I lived in that chair for weeks. I missed Algebra and going to prom just so I could wiggle deeper into the uncomfortable depths of that faux-leather chair and watch as Dad’s skin got paler, his breathing more labored.
So, really, it’s not like I didn’t know it was coming.
But when the vultures descended, that’s when it really hit me.
 Family members I’d never met swooped in and cried over him like his pulse had already stopped. Some brought flower arrangements so gloomy they shouldn’t even be allowed in a cemetery. One lady had the nerve to ask me about his will.
And then it happened. I was reading a lame magazine article about how many times LiLo has been in jail, when the beeping that had long-since faded to ambient background noise suddenly roared to life. Then the screen with zigzagging squiggles went nuts.
It was pretty much over by the time the doctor strolled in. He checked the charts, went through the motions of trying to resuscitate, and declared Dad dead at 9:10 pm.
After that, people patted my head like I was some kind of imbecilic dog, and then took over my life. A distant, twice-removed aunt snatched the funeral planning from me and never asked my opinion. Dad was put in a hideous coffin and dropped six-feet-under before I’d even caught my breath.
And, like some kind of child-sacrifice, I was constantly surrounded by people I don’t know, all of whom a cloaked themselves in insincere sorrow and cheap black outfits. The ritual of Dad’s funeral was beyond abhorrent. Men and women keep whispering, “It’ll get better,” right before they stumble their way over to the bar.
But it won’t.
I’d rather be back in that horrible faux-leather chair, Dad dying right in front of me, than standing amidst so many strangers. There’s nothing better about life now.
Dad made me grilled cheese on rainy days. He grounded me when I was stupid and tried to sneak out. He told me stories about Mom, because I was too young to know her when she died.
He loved me.
…and I don’t see how anything could be better than that.

2 comments:

  1. HeeHee anything but a wake2wake-up. Follow me...

    Dunno if you RITE... yet, lemme add summore thots; lemme fill-you-up withe efficacious epiphany, the avant-gardeness and necessary wisdom to achieve Seventh-Heaven, dear, if ya desire Seventh-Heaven...

    If 'freedom lies in being bold' (Robert Frost), doesn't pushing-the-envelope also result in the Elysian Fields of Utopia? If I'm the sower, we plant the Seed; if I'm an artist, we RITE the symphonies heard Upstairs ☆IF☆ we accept His lead withe orchestra...

    Wanna find-out the fax, Jak, in a wurld fulla the 'power of cowards'? Wanna wiseabove to help a 'Plethora Of Wurdz' [POW!] which are look'n for a new home in thy novelty?? Yay!

    Q: But [gulp] can anyone tell me the difference between K2/IQ? A: Nthn. In Heaven, we gitt'm both for eternity HA! Need a few more thots, ideers, wild wurdz (whoa, Nelly! easy, girl!) or ironclad iconoclasms?

    VERBUM SAT SAPIENTI (Latin: words to [the] wise): As an ex-writer of the sassy, savvy, schizophenia we all go thro in this lifelong demise, I just wanna help U.S. git past the ping-pong-politixx, the whorizontal more!ass! we're in and wiseabove to 'in fine sine fine' (Latin: in [the] End without End -Saint Augustine).

    "This finite existence is only a test, son," God Almighty told me in my coma. "Far beyond thy earthly tempest is where you'll find tangible, corpulent eloquence". Lemme tella youse without d'New Joisey accent...

    I actually saw Seventh-Heaven when we died: you couldn't GET!! any moe curly, party-hardy-endorphins, low-hanging-fruit of the Celestial Paradise, extravagantly-surplus-lush Upstairs (awww! baby kitties, too!!) when my o-so-beautifull, brilliant, bombastic girly passed-away due to those wry, sardonic satires...

    "Those who are wise will shine as brightly as the expanse of the Heavens, and those who have instructed many in uprightousness as bright as stars for all eternity" -Daniel 12:3, NJB

    Here's also what the prolific, exquisite GODy sed: 'the more you shall honor Me, the more I shall bless you' -the Infant Jesus of Prague.

    Go gitt'm, girly. You're incredible. You're indelible. Cya Upstairs. I won't be joining'm in the nasty Abyss where Isis prowls
    thesuperseedoftime.blogspot.com
    infowars.com
    JohnLeary.com
    -YOUTHwitheTRUTH
    -------------------------------
    PS Need summore unique, uncivilized, useless names?? Lemme gonna gitcha started, brudda:

    Oak Woods, Franky Sparks, Athena Noble, Autumn Rose, Faith Bishop, Dolly Martin, Willow Rhodes, Cocoa Major, Roman Stone, Bullwark Burnhart, Magnus Wilde, Kardiak Arrest, Will Wright, Goldy Silvers, Penelope Summers, Sophie Sharp, Violet Snow, Lizzy Roach, BoxxaRoxx, Aunty Dotey, Romero Stark, Zacharia Neptoon, Mercurio Morrissey, Fritz & Felix Franz, Victor Payne, Isabella Silverstein, Mercedes Kennedy, Redd Rust, Phoenix Martini, Ivy Squire, Sauer Wolfe, Yankee Cooky, blessed b9... (or mixNmatch)

    God blessa youse
    (trustNjesus)
    -Fr. Sarducci, ol SNL
    ☆refuse2Bindifferent☆

    ReplyDelete
  2. HeeHee anything but a wake2wake-up. Follow me...

    Dunno if you RITE... yet, lemme add summore thots; lemme fill-you-up withe efficacious epiphany, the avant-gardeness and necessary wisdom to achieve Seventh-Heaven, dear, if ya desire Seventh-Heaven...

    If 'freedom lies in being bold' (Robert Frost), doesn't pushing-the-envelope also result in the Elysian Fields of Utopia? If I'm the sower, we plant the Seed; if I'm an artist, we RITE the symphonies heard Upstairs ☆IF☆ we accept His lead withe orchestra...

    Wanna find-out the fax, Jak, in a wurld fulla the 'power of cowards'? Wanna wiseabove to help a 'Plethora Of Wurdz' [POW!] which are look'n for a new home in thy novelty?? Yay!

    Q: But [gulp] can anyone tell me the difference between K2/IQ? A: Nthn. In Heaven, we gitt'm both for eternity HA! Need a few more thots, ideers, wild wurdz (whoa, Nelly! easy, girl!) or ironclad iconoclasms?

    VERBUM SAT SAPIENTI (Latin: words to [the] wise): As an ex-writer of the sassy, savvy, schizophenia we all go thro in this lifelong demise, I just wanna help U.S. git past the ping-pong-politixx, the whorizontal more!ass! we're in and wiseabove to 'in fine sine fine' (Latin: in [the] End without End -Saint Augustine).

    "This finite existence is only a test, son," God Almighty told me in my coma. "Far beyond thy earthly tempest is where you'll find tangible, corpulent eloquence". Lemme tella youse without d'New Joisey accent...

    I actually saw Seventh-Heaven when we died: you couldn't GET!! any moe curly, party-hardy-endorphins, low-hanging-fruit of the Celestial Paradise, extravagantly-surplus-lush Upstairs (awww! baby kitties, too!!) when my o-so-beautifull, brilliant, bombastic girly passed-away due to those wry, sardonic satires...

    "Those who are wise will shine as brightly as the expanse of the Heavens, and those who have instructed many in uprightousness as bright as stars for all eternity" -Daniel 12:3, NJB

    Here's also what the prolific, exquisite GODy sed: 'the more you shall honor Me, the more I shall bless you' -the Infant Jesus of Prague.

    Go gitt'm, girly. You're incredible. You're indelible. Cya Upstairs. I won't be joining'm in the nasty Abyss where Isis prowls
    thesuperseedoftime.blogspot.com
    infowars.com
    JohnLeary.com
    -YOUTHwitheTRUTH
    -------------------------------
    PS Need summore unique, uncivilized, useless names?? Lemme gonna gitcha started, brudda:

    Oak Woods, Franky Sparks, Athena Noble, Autumn Rose, Faith Bishop, Dolly Martin, Willow Rhodes, Cocoa Major, Roman Stone, Bullwark Burnhart, Magnus Wilde, Kardiak Arrest, Will Wright, Goldy Silvers, Penelope Summers, Sophie Sharp, Violet Snow, Lizzy Roach, BoxxaRoxx, Aunty Dotey, Romero Stark, Zacharia Neptoon, Mercurio Morrissey, Fritz & Felix Franz, Victor Payne, Isabella Silverstein, Mercedes Kennedy, Redd Rust, Phoenix Martini, Ivy Squire, Sauer Wolfe, Yankee Cooky, blessed b9... (or mixNmatch)

    God blessa youse
    (trustNjesus)
    -Fr. Sarducci, ol SNL
    ☆refuse2Bindifferent☆

    ReplyDelete